Today marks the one year point since our paperwork was submitted to Ethiopia. On that day we never would have guessed that it would take this long (at that point there was an estimated 4-6 month wait). We are trying to be cautious in our response when people ask us about how the process is going. Adoption is so dear to our hearts that we would not want any comments coming from our impatience or emotions to cause someone else not to adopt. There are already so many negative ideas floating around about the cost, the wait times and the difficulty of adoption. It is hard to know what to say. So we smile and respond, “We are just waiting.” Some days it feels like we are pretending, like this waiting will never come to an end. We wish we had a “due date” like many of our friends who have gotten pregnant and had babies since our adoption process began. Often it feels like our entire life in on hold. It is hard to make any kind of plans for the future when there is an empty space in our family and we don’t know when it will be filled. And then there are times when I (Megan) cry for no apparent reason at a commercial, song on the radio or picture of a child, not realizing I had been holding back tears all day long. It those moments God gently reminds us that the ache we are feeling is a necessary part of this process. He is making room in our hearts for the child that one day we will get to hold in our arms.
The reality is adoption is a battle for the lives and hearts of children. It is standing up and telling them they are worth it, every minute, every penny and every emotion. This is the first time either one of us have really had to wait a significant amount of time for anything we wanted. It is hard. It is humbling. And we are confident it will be worth every minute. We are just waiting…and that it okay.
